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June 30, 2005

We salute our Locutus of Blog, Abra, as she joins the ranks of the graduated and begins her life in Seattle. We send her off with open hearts and our warmest of wishes. Take luck and enjoy your adventures, NerdyGirl, but remember we are only a blog post away.





Beautiful girl, You are always taking pictures of yourself in mirrors. I have a theory. You don't actually believe you are real. You've lived in academia so long that you believe you have become the constructs that people think you are. Now, you have the opportunity to be the person you want to be and live the life you want. I hope the mirror photos don't stop, but that you are finally able to see what I do...an amazing woman and friend.

posted at 7:46 AM
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June 28, 2005







Fucking allergies.

posted at 9:27 AM
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June 27, 2005

This weekend a friend asked me about my "secret ritual." By this she meant, those things I do when I am home alone...having me time. This is not the oh-nothing-is-going-on-so-I'll-stay-home-stuff or even the must-clean-the-house-and-collapse-stuff. She wanted the I-planned-to-stay-home-and-pamper-myself-stuff, in detail.

I'd never thought of this before. What actions did I repeat often enough to be considered ritual? I had to decide what was repeated because I wanted it to be and what was a result of my finding repetitive tasks comforting.

I do indeed have a "secret ritual." Although, secret is a strange word here. I am sharing this with you now, so therefore it is no longer secret. That being said, it is likely that most will never know when I have had one of these nights...so it will still be somewhat of a secret.

After the onslaught of her questions, my ritual can be laid out like this: These nights are rarely a concious choice. From my point of view, they happen when they need to, without my rearranging the schedule or neglecting phone calls and emails. It usually begins in the late evening, after dinner. I take a shower...longer than the morning get-clean ones but shorter than the staying-in-until-the-water-turns-to-ice ones. Wrapped in fresh towels, this is the only time I use two (hair and body), I move on to the pamper part. First there is lotion. Lots of lotion. Everywhere. The good, thick, supposed to be for massages type stuff. This last time it was of the sandalwood rose flavor. Then into jammies. They can't be everyday pj pants and tank top. No, indeed the nightie that was probably meant to be lingerie but that has since taken on a new roll finds life on these nights. Now for my favorite part. I find something to drink...water, tea, chai all work well. Wine makes this absolutely perfect. Glass in hand I settle in for a movie, but only after lighting as many candles as my apartment will allow and turning off the lamps. There are generally three movies that I choose from for these nights; The Last of the Mohicans, Almost Famous, and Secretary. Occasionally, Love Actually or one of the vampire movies will sneak into the rotation. When the movie is over, the glass stays in the living room, the candles are blown out, and I curl up in bed to read or sleep. Not overly exciting for the world in general but beautifully decadent to me.

What is your secret ritual?

posted at 8:05 AM
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June 24, 2005

I've found 3 templates that I like. Now on to deciding which I can live with for a while. #1, #2, #3

Thank you Sarah! (She played, tweaked, and tried to build me a template!)

Some of the titles in the links section have been changed or added.

I want a nap.

Finding an apartment long distance is a pain. Sucks goat toes, actually.

Rosmary's Baby is the film tonight. Anyone want to come? Geology building rm 216, bring a pillow.

Craig's List only hits Phoenix. Damn!

Get your Pirate's Name here. I'm Mad Mary Rakham (Rack 'em). Aaarrgghh!

I need to do laundry.

Book shopping sounds fabulous right now. Wonder if there are any good, twisted, fairy tales out now?

There are 3 bug bites on my right leg. This irks me. I was wearing jeans yesterday.

Nope, nothing important to say.

Happy P.O.E.T.S. Day!

posted at 11:15 AM
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June 22, 2005

When did everything suddenly become overly large in blogger? Is it just my computer? Please say I didn't accidently hit the "fucks shit up" button...grrr! I did. All better now though. Wait. No! Foiled again! Why do I pretend to be a computer geek?


Anyway, I'm feeling the urge to revamp Mandyland. The multilayered, bubble gum meets hooker Barbie pink just isn't doing it for me right now. I'm horrible at finding new set-ups, but would prefer to not use the basic blogger ones. Any ideas? Help me start gathering sites, please...

Also, There are a few people who have been left off the links list up till now. Emily, Kyle, Monk, Griffin.....Are you willing to be linked? Anyone else? I'm sure I'm forgetting several someones. Dead links will be going away too. Anyone absolutely dying to stay linked even if you don't post anymore?

Any other suggestions, concerns, questions, or gifts?

Side note** All fixed now. Everything is it's proper size. Yay me!

posted at 9:57 AM
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June 21, 2005

Last night....I bought avacados, bananas, and sunflowers.
Last night....I played in the rain.
This morning..I fed owls.
This morning..I watched the sun come up.
This morning..I fell back to sleep.
This morning..I moved my stereo closer to the wall.
This morning..I blasted AFI (teen goth music) while I took my shower.
Today.........I wore a cute skirt and pinned my hair back.
Today.........Is going to be a great day!



***
Today is the Summer Solstice...go play outside!

posted at 7:59 AM
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June 20, 2005

Week 1 Sci-fi/Horror rundown:

1. The Day the Earth Stood Still. The alien is a geeky, somewhat vengeful, Christ figure. Everyone sing along, "Michael Rennie was ill the Day the Earth Stood Still..." Oh, and let's not forget about nuclear war.

2. The Thing. Lots of scientific advancement vs. moral advancement. The whole nuclear war thing again. And will you just "Shut the door!"

3. 2001: A Space Odyssey. An obilisque that inflicts strange mutating powers on all who touch it. Or is that called evolution? A computer who thinks for himself. There is also the plaguing question of: Why didn't someone tell Mr.Kubric that he didn't need to include the entirety of the "Blue Danube" waltz....twice?

4.Alien. Inside is safe. Outside is chaos or death. Think cancer. It grows inside you until it kills you. Ripley was meant to be played by a male. The costumer should be shot. Couldn't they find space underwear that fit Ms. Weaver properly?


*There should be five films, but one was cut due to someone touching the invisible "fucks shit up" button. Now, I must go write the paper that is due at 6 tonight.

posted at 8:39 AM
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June 18, 2005

It started with a cuddle on the sofa with a Pretty Flower.
It hit harder during the impromptu half-drag show put on by Marty Graw and Oblivia.
It made me cry instead of sing with the chorus of "Rent".

It took me a while to get here. I was not acknowledging the truth....this ball of nervous energy and excitement isn't all about the job. I will no longer be able to see the loves of my life (at any given time). I've never set out on adventure alone. I know deep inside this situation is good. Right now....right now I want to go back to ignoring this pain.

posted at 1:01 AM
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June 17, 2005

This is possibly the coolest body scrub in the universe! Now, before anyone calls me on not actually trying all the body scrubs in existence....check this out:




A new way to get your caffeine in the morning! The scrubby part of this is ground up coffee beans. Not only does your skin look good, but there is this nice little "alive" tingle left over. Plus, the mocha smell lasts for a good hour (at least) if you don't put lotion or perfume/cologne on over it! Absolute indulgence....yummy! Bonus prize? It is on sale!

Oh, and if mocha isn't your style, there is also a Kona coffee style and a Margarita style.

posted at 9:10 AM
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June 15, 2005

The Interview Game


Here are The Official Interview Game Rules:

1. If you want to participate, leave a comment below saying "interview me."
2. I will respond by asking you five questions - each person's will be different.
3. You will update your journal/blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview others in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.


My questions from Linus:

1)By means of an advanced global electrostatic broad spectrum, um, ray thingy, aliens have removed the color pink from the spectrum. What takes its place?

I've got your advanced global electrostatic broad spectrum ray thingy right here! Khan!! Err...umm...blue?

2) Cucumber or zucchini?

Hmmm.. Which to use? The cuc is smooth and firm. You can squeeze with quite a bit of pressure before the skin breaks. But the zucchini...the striations are interesting. Texture can be a very good thing. Both take a bit of work. I suppose it comes down to...What am I making for dinner?

3) Like any good Seer in a Conan movie, your clairvoyant powers will cease once you lose your virginity (ahem). What job in the Ministry will you apply for if/when that happens?

Fluffy bunnies of the apocalypse. All four of them. Think Hindi deities....multiple personalities and arms....err ears.

4) Soon you will leave for Lake Havasu. What will you miss the most from Laramie?

Until the compound is built, stocked, and guarded I will miss the Flock...and all of the fringy followers. And the snow...and the wind...and having to leave town to find stores without "Mart" in the name...

5) As you reinvent yourself in Arizona, your AFF profile will need to be revamped a bit. Show us a rough draft the new you.

HI, I'm a transplant from the wilds of Wyoming. I aspire to be look like Jessica Simpson, but with the smarts of Lisa Simpson. I went to veterinary school because I like kids. I'm looking for a Gilbert Godfreid type Master. Preferably one who would rather sit on the sofa than do anything social. I'm great at house cleaning and will willingly pick your dirty underwear up off the floor...


Must stop now...am laughing so hard this hurts!

posted at 8:24 AM
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June 14, 2005

I got the job!

I am Lake Havasu, Arizona's newest English Teacher! (No details yet...still working that out.)


For those in the know....it's finally official!

Everyone happy dance with me....Right where you are.....That's it!

posted at 7:53 AM
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June 13, 2005

Monday morning IM conversation with Lady (my mom)

L: I didn't go (to church) yesterday...I'm a pansy.

M: Huh..why not?

L: It was pouring...looked like I might need a boat...or a poncho.

M: Well, that is a good reason...though I'm sure someone would have had an umbrella.

L: I just need something to get to the car. I poke myself in the eye with an umbrella. Besides, it's sideways when I hold it with my walker.

M: So, the person taking you couldn't hold the umbrella for you?

L: They're both older than me, even older than grandma. Penny wasn't here. She was back east.

M: ok

L: I haven't owned an umbrella since I was little and would stand in the rain to watch the worms go down the gutter.

M: goober.

L: No, its worse to put them on a sponge and send them down... they get stuck in the holes.

M: Mom! Why would you do that? Poor innocent wormies!

L: Because it is TRUE! I am an expert.

M: Do you also throw Alka-seltzer to seagulls? Feed bubble gum to gophers?

L: No, the only place to see gulls here is the dump and gum to gophers is like that cartoon with the dog farting out bubbles. But, I did put worms in a band-aid box and scare your grandma with them.

M: I only remember you putting gummy worms in desserts to scare grandma.

L: Worms and I have been friends a long time

M: So you like worms...but not grasshoppers?

L: NO HOPPERS!!!!

L: At least you were too little to remember me bailing out of the car and leaving you in your car seat because a hopper was in the car!

M: laughs...wow. Why don't other creepy crawlies bother you?

L: Haven't met that many..like what?

M: Spiders, ants, ladybugs....anything....snakes?

L: I am only really afraid of hoppers and ex-husbands, they 're snakes

M: uggghhh!!!

L: I had 3 birthday cakes and 2 meals out! and got a lot of good-smelling stuff too.

M: Yay! go you!

L: You can just call me spoiled. At least I don't smell that way. I have to get dressed to go. See you ssssssssssss Sunday... did you see that snake go by?

M: ~groan~ go away!

posted at 10:13 AM
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June 10, 2005

Dear Mr. Vernon: We accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole Saturday in detention for whatever it was we did wrong. But, we think you're crazy to make us write an essay telling you who we think we are. You see us as you want to see us: in the simplest terms, in the most convenient definitions. But, what we found out is that each one of us is: a brain . . .an athlete . . .a basket case . . .a princess . . .AND a criminal.




The Breakfast Club is celebrating its 20th Anniversary!

I remember seeing this movie, and adoring it, when it came out in the '80s. It is still one of my favorite movies, even though I can no longer identify with just one of the characters. Anyone born after 1980 will now close their mouths and keep quiet. I have clothespins and they fit nicely on tongues!

*****************
Holy Awkward Moment, Batman!

I tried to avoid it. I really did. Unfortunately, the part of my brain that thrives on popculture forced me to watch the MTV Movie Awards. Between Jimmy Falon not giving his "A game", Napoleon Dynomite winning too many awards, and some thoroughly stupid mini-movies there were a couple stellar moments. Not really. Unlike previous years, this one had more disturbing moments than memorable ones. It started its downhill roll when Eminem decided it would be a good idea to perform an intro song with life-sized CrankYankers booty-girls. I gave up on the show shortly after Tom Cruise gave his overly prepared acceptance speech for being a lifetime entertainer. In true award show fashion there was a montage of Tom's movies. However, they chose to downplay one of his less mainstream roles.





I don't understand why. Come on Tom, you can't possibly be ashamed of a movie where you run around in a chainmail tunic (but little else), talk with trolls and elves, Tim Curry plays a demon, and you get to proclaim to the world that you believe in unicorns!?!

*************
I started watching a strangely fascinating B-movie fairytale last night. Snow White: A Tale of Terror. Sigourney Weaver plays the evil step-mother/witch. It seems to be trying to get back to the original, dark, violent, non-disneyized fairytales. There are moments where it is exceedingly Gothic and others when it falls into a vague we-must-be-in-the-middle ages-she's wearing a long dress and his sleeves aren't sewn on completely - time period. Anybody up for renting it and MST3K'ing it with me?

************
And one last picture, just for the easily breakable Brit.




Ass-Chaps!!!

posted at 9:24 AM
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June 09, 2005

I've managed to spill on myself at least 3 times today. Tea, hot chocolate, and the ongoing deluge of water fountain drips. Hmmm..I like the word deluge...it's just fun to say. I wish I had money. So many things I want to do, see, buy, visit, investigate, or experience this summer are out of my league for a while. My nose itches. I've been battling allergies since last night. It sucks being allergic to the town you live in. I stumbled onto some fun picture sites including the Folsom Street Fair picture archives. There is a blog/picture post in the works that should be fun on all sorts of levels. Spidergag. The theme song to Picture Pages just popped into my head. Remember it? Bored. Very bored.

posted at 2:18 PM
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June 07, 2005

If janitor-boy argues with me one more time about profiles, the domain merge, chairs, drinks, or the position of the sun - I WILL MURDER HIM! His limbs will be torn asunder and nailed to nearby walls as trophies. His head will be taken from him and served to the King of Squidgy Trolls, on a silver spork. If only blood splatter wasn't so art deco...

posted at 9:05 AM
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June 06, 2005

After sitting in the lab for hours (not really, more like 1) the universe (msn messenger) opened and a reason for being alive on a Monday was revealed. I blame Zeus (the gay boy not the god).


Z: I found some dildoes that I KNOW you don't have
M: I wanna see!
Z: http://www.divine-interventions.com/index2.php

(Time lapse as he visits the lab and we discuss the various pro's and con's for most of these.)

M: OMG!!!! http://www.ballsies.com Only to be followed by this http://bumpernuts.com
Z: I want the key ring to hang from my baby jesus butt plug!

posted at 9:31 AM
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June 04, 2005

June 4, 2005

12:30 ish am: In semi-sleep I heard a crashing, popping sound. I blamed the cat. He was running around the apartment wildly. It only seemed logical.

8 am: Awoke to discover there was no electricity. Why was there no electricity? Went to look outside and found the source of earlier crashing, popping sound. The back yard tree broken in half.....and covered with SNOW! I promptly called Jim to confirm that this wasn't some sick joke on the part of the assmuppets. Then went back to bed.

10 -11 am: Showered in the dark. There was still no electricity. It is amazing how much light two little candles can give off. Then hitched a ride with Abra out to Jim's abode for breakfast type foods and co-couch potatoing. He has electricity.

2pm: There is still no electricity for "the cupboard under the stairs." On my way to a friend's I encountered the Grand Ave. obstacle course. Road workers aren't out to move the large and scarily sharp tree branches from the various areas of the road, yet. Several driveways have flooded to lake like conditions.

330pm: I'm sitting at the Union. They have electricity. I just checked the road conditions. While everything is melting here, the highway from Laramie to Vedauwoo is closed. I'm now homebound to take a nap.....since there is no electricity.

4pm: There is now electricity at my apartment. My windows are flooding. Neighbors are taking it upon themselves to clear the streets and yards of dead trees....at least the parts that can be carried. There is a rather creepy man with a chainsaw in my back yard. I'm praying he is there to dismantle the poor broken tree.

5pm: I've managed to stop the window flooding. However, I was unsuccessful at keeping any towels dry. The floor in the closet is ruined, the water got in under the door. After a quick check, it appears the chainsaw man was powerless. The tree parts are still drooping heavily over the fence and powerlines.

715 pm: Our saga ends. I'm off to play games and avoid snow puddles.

posted at 3:08 PM
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June 02, 2005

It may have been because I stayed up through the wee hours reading. Maybe it was the quiet rush of raindrops on my window, heard as I approached consciousness. It could be that I had nested so happily that movement was torture. In reality, it was my cat. He usually curls up on the pillow next to me, shortly before the alarm goes off. It is his way of spending time with a sleepy, cuddly mom without having to dodge or move when I change positions. Today he chose to curl up against my stomach. Purring. If I moved, he stretched and snuggled closer. We gained at least 20 lbs. of comfortable, sleepy weight in about 10 minutes. Needless to say, I was late this morning. All I want to do now is go home and nestle with a sleepy cat in warm blankets.

posted at 9:43 AM
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Mandyland
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